the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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