I want to stick my p in your. b.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
