did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize