What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
