my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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