Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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