She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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