I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
