I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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