oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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