based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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