Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
