i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
