I just pynch a tree in the face
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize