i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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