so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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