The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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