She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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