if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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