Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
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