id be glad to
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
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