Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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