People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
