apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize