Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
