dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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