i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
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You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
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I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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