Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Screwed.edu
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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