He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
