I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
