If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize