The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
