Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
