Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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