did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
smell my finger.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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