he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize