there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
