But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
