Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
