Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
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nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Please don't give away my fajitas
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