Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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