Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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