You're a womanizer and a bitch.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
