Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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