Who wears a wallet chain?!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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