is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
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Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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