There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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