using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
