problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
