escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
