so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize