There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
